We Do WHAT In The Shadows!? - Ep. 13

Exit pursued by The Hunky Monk, Arnold Weissnegger!

Guy Skeleton ends up in a cave in Lapland, and tries (unsuccessfully) to distance himself from the world. 

Content warning: Profanity, death, banking

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Hello and welcome to your worst nightmare, another RPG actual play podcast. Solitude, a journaling RPG podcast, is just me in a room. Not to brag. With a journal, a solo RPG, and some damn good coffee. I play to see what happens in the story, write in my fictional journal, and you get to hang out next to me by the fire. My name is Auri. Welcome. I hope you enjoy our time together. This is solitude. We do what? In the shadows? Let's get this show on the road, is what the Legionnaire Circus said before their acts started strangely disappearing. Um, I had a lot of fun writing the past journals. It was a fun change of pace to just throw out characters I knew were gonna get eaten immediately. This is actual play episode number seven. Uh I'd like to take a few seconds to do a little recap thing at the beginning. Guy Skeleton is turning 100 years old, and it feels like it's it's like a milestone in his life. He's lived at least one full lifetime now. Uh that's where the long age is starting to maybe wear him out. I don't know if that's what's gonna happen, or if it's or if he's just going to get more guy and even more skeleton than before. He grew up in the Italian Apennines in the mountain range, raised by monks. A monastery of English exchange monks in the Italian mountain side, who composed music and played an early version of volleyball called Holyball. He was a good musician, and the monkly duties were fine for him. And he is still a Christian, I think. He why wouldn't he be? He he would be more Christian now than ever. Uh his soul is clearly in more danger than than for most people. So he fell in love with Garibaldi, who didn't really love him back. It was one of those things, it was a teenage romance gay romp in a in an Italian-English monastery. Uh, we've all had those, so you don't need me to explain what it is. Guido, as he was called before, kinda got obsessed with young Garibaldi, and that's when his change happened. That's when he became a child of the night. And it was done by a visiting monk, an Austrian monk named Arnold Weischnegger, who was already an old man. Didn't seem like it. He was he was well muscled, well built. But he'd been around for a long time. And I think I'm not sure if it's canon, but it was there there's talk that he's the person who has invented Holyball. And in a late night practice session, Guido was turned. And Guido wasn't told of any kind of mission, like um, Father Weishneger didn't have any sort of plan, or if he does, or if he did, uh he certainly didn't tell Guido about it. So Guido was turned into a vampire and then just left to his own devices. He killed his mentor, the chief monk. And then Garibaldi fell in love with Guido, because Guido was a murdering bastard. Garibaldi liked that. And it took a while for Guido to get away from that toxic relationship, uh, but uh they were together for a while. They lived in Firenze, in Florence, where they were street musicians, and uh Garibaldi enjoyed watching Guido eat. In Florence, two important things happened. First, Guido was scouted by a holyball team. They space jammed the holyball skills Guido had away from him and put them in in a jigsaw puzzle of a giant man called Giuseppe the Giant. Guido gave up his holyball skills. I don't know what's gonna happen, but Guido currently he's he's been without his skills for half a century now. And the other important thing that happened was that he found out that he that his biological parents live in Paris, and he was told this by a Parisian vampire lady, uh noble lady called uh Angelique de Boulangerie. Guido then moved to Paris with Garibaldi. Guido killed a guy and took his identity, took his wife as well, uh, a minor noble family, the Delacroix family. While living in Paris, uh Guido took the identity of Marcel de la Croix, Marcel Delacroix, and fell in love with his wife. I mean it happens sometimes. He spent a lifetime with her, while also finding out that he's half flesh golem and half skeleton. Inside his fleshy body lies the bony frame of a skeleton man. Although that that doesn't make any sense, because that's just a human being. But I don't care. It might make sense at some point. It won't. So who cares? Who the fuck cares? That's that's my motto for this campaign. Who the fuck cares? Uh so he didn't really get to enjoy any kind of a special relationship, at least yet with his skeleton family, uh, since he's he's like um he's a bastard. Gidd's wife died. In his grief, he wasn't careful enough, and he gained the attention of the symposium, a group of philosophers. What philosophers do is they hunt supernatural creatures of darkness, and the theory of philosophy is just bullshit. So he met René Descartes in Paris, and they had whatever they had a moment, whatever it was, they had a sexual-flavored moment, let's say, let's say, let's call it that. Uh, but there was some kind of a spark between them and Guido got away. Or Guy Skeleton, as he's as he's called now. Guy Skeleton left Paris to hide. Descartes let him leave as long as he stayed out. So he he left and joined the circus, because that's what freaks do. He joined the International Traveling Legionnus. Uh, but it didn't go too well. He ate them all. He got too greedy, and by the end he decided that it would probably be best if he withdrew from humanity. And we'll see if that's what we get to today, or if he's gonna begin his journey, probably, to the ends of the earth to to shut himself away from from society. Uh, so he won't eat anybody ever again. Um we'll see. We'll see how it goes. I have no idea. I have I have absolutely nothing planned. So it all depends on the prompt and and the inspiration I get from it. And I have no idea how long this campaign is gonna be. So I'm not sure if this is a halfway point. Like, I'm not saying there's gonna be 14 or 15 episodes. Uh I I don't know. It's gonna go as long as I feel like playing, and as long as the story feels good to me. But this felt like an end of an era for Guy Skeleton, and it's nice to do a small recap so everybody's uh on board for what's gonna happen next. Let's roll, baby. That is minus four. So it's prompt number fourteen. An enemy character uses a lost resource to turn your few friends against you. Check three skills to regain the resource, or check one skill to barely survive. Which former friend did you kill? Where did you flee? So an enemy character, which kind of enemies do we have? Giuseppe the giant isn't really an enemy. Since uh we left off okay with the cult. Siegfried the skeleton, no? Angelique, no. Muscle, yep. Father Weischeneger might be an enemy. Rene Descartes, definitely an enemy. We still have we've never done anything with the the character we created at the very beginning in the first episode, Veronica, who was a smuggler, uh and Guido owes her quite a bit of money. Veronica would be a hundred years old. It could be like the debt guy had is now owned by someone else. Like Veronica's little side hustle business became a a legit bank, and the bank is out to get theirs from Guy's Skeleton. Is there a more evil enemy than a bank? Who's fucking scared of vampires when banks exist? You've heard of the meme Would you rather encounter a bear or a or a man in the woods? Well, that's old news. Would you rather encounter a vampire or a bank? That's a toughie. I'm leaning vampire. So what lost resources do we have? We have the handkerchief and father Augustus loot. I I like this. I like I like all of this except that the enemy character would use a lost resource because we have the Father Augustus loot is a lost resource, and the handkerchief with the ZZZ initials. That's that's a lost one as well. The handkerchief could be used. Uh somebody could get them or find it, uh, and make like a wrong assumption. That would probably have to be the boulangerie family, and they would think that I've left to join my skeletal family. Like they they'd they'd assume I've jumped the ship, they'd assume I've crossed over onto the skeleton side. It is time to bring Father Weischenger back. He has been trying to find Guy Skeleton. He's been tracking Guy Skeleton, so I'm gonna say he's found the handkerchief, he's found the loot, and he's because Father Weischenegger can bench press so fucking hard, his sense of smell is heightened. His nose has a six-pack. You get what I'm saying? He's a hound dog. So he's got guy sent, and guy is trying to move away. He's trying to flee. I wanna say he's moving north. Maybe in Sweden. Uh Norway. There's less sun, so makes sense. At least in the winter. In the summer it's gonna it's gonna suck. So yeah, Father Weischenegger is trying to find him, and he's using the lost resources against me. So I'll have to check one skill to barely survive, and I'll have to kill a former friend. So yeah, Father Weischenegger is using my old friends to find me. He's using the boulangeries, because I I escaped Paris. I probably guy skeleton probably didn't really tell the boulangeries. He's been working with them a little bit. He's been like in their vampire clan. In the larger boulangerie family. The boulangeries may be thought of that as treason in some way. So he recruited Angelique to help him find me. They've been tracking me up north. Somewhere in in in Sweden, Norway, Finland. I kill Angelique. I flee even further north. I only have two skills that I haven't checked. So I have hypnosis and being a good husband. I want to use being a good husband. That's more interesting. Hypnosis is kind of just like shab and it's gone. Um, being a good husband. Um Guy Skeleton will tug on the heartstrings of Angelique. Because Angelique probably knew Elise as well. Maybe they liked each other. Maybe maybe they were friends, maybe they were close. The way Guy Skeleton explains why he left suddenly makes sense to Angélique. That Guy is leaving Paris, well, because of uh the philosopher's symposium, but also because he lived a life in Paris, and that life is gone with Elise's departure. It's like a return of the Jedi moment where uh Guy Guy convinces Angelique to turn on their their master, uh Weissnegger, and together they fight enough. Angelique dies in the confrontation, and Guy flees. Further north. I wonder if we find out what uh what Weischenegger wants. What could he want? Why is he looking for Guy's skeleton? I don't think he's not looking for Guy to kill him. That doesn't make any sense. Wechenegger is. What is he? He's uh he's a monk, he's a muscle enthusiast, a man of protein, and a reasonable amount of fiber. He is building the ultimate team. He's currently oh yes, yes, this is it. He is preparing for the ultimate battle of Holyball. Weichnegger has been traveling in Asia, in northern Africa, in Eastern Europe. He's been turning people into vampires, he's been looking for supernatural creatures. He's been building the all-star team of Holy Ball. Fallen priests, fallen monks, evil nuns, who are now playing the game of the devil with the devil himself, essentially. He's preparing because there's gonna be like uh like a Mortal Kombat tournament of volleyball. A tournament to end all tournaments. And he's been looking for a guy because it's time. This is why he was turned. But to Weisenegger's shock, he finds out Guy Skeleton can't play ball anymore. I don't want to make this like an actual the fate of the world depends on this. I don't want the stakes to be that high. I'm I'm not really I'm not gonna say what the stakes are yet, because I I I'm I wanna figure that out later. I wanna figure that out as we go, but for now, this is this is good. There's no reason for Father Weischeneger to pursue Guy further up north. The thing he wanted to get can't be got. I don't know when the Mortal Kombat tournament is gonna happen, but it's gonna be it's gonna be in the future. Maybe Guy. Guy feels like he should be there. So we'll see. Alright. So that's that. We f I f we finally, I finally found out why uh what what Weischnegger's deal is, and uh this this I I like this very much. Maybe it's somehow like vampires against mortals sort of thing. Maybe somehow existence or balance of unnatural creatures is somehow somehow the stakes there. Let's do a second prompt. We move forward seven spaces. Um that's uh twenty one. You are trapped outside when the sun rises, and take shelter someplace you are not supposed to be. A child discovers and befriends you. Create a mortal child character and record a humanizing experience. This is interesting. I was kind of hoping to get something that will allow me to stay secluded or something introspective, but I I think this this can work like that as well, because the humanizing experience can be very introspective. He's like way up north, at sea, at the Barents, Barents, Barents, see? He's been there for years, and he's been contemplating, he's been meditating, he's been trying to rid himself of his bloodlust, rid himself of his earthly needs, and just be one with nature. He's been eating animals, no humans for a long time, and he takes shelter because he's trapped outside, he's he travels further than he usually does. There's probably like a human there's human settlements, villages. He encounters fishermen at the at the sea. Like he sees them, they see him, maybe there's some rumors going about him. He's out. He's not hunting, what is he doing? Guy does not enjoy this. For years he's told himself this is what he needs to do. This is good for him, this is good for the world, this is he shouldn't exist. He should he should seclude himself from society, and he probably should he's been contemplating ending it all. But he can't help kind of communicate with the fisherman. He creates signs, path on the cliff side, some some messages. They don't share a language, but they wave at each other. Probably the fishermen consider him an elf or some other kind of woodland creature of of superstition. One time he's painting at a cliffside. He's painting on a cliffside some images, some short messages for the fishermen. Because Guy he's a social creature, he he needs other people. He has a fall, and he's unconscious. He falls down to the shore and is unconscious for a while, and a child encounters him. The sun, like just getting up, a child has taken him to a cave, and he wakes up there. So he doesn't take shelter by himself, and the child doesn't know he's he's uh definitely allergic to sunshine. He just the child takes Guy to some shelter. And a child may be 10, 11, 12 years old, something like that. And they befriend each other. They share a human experience. At first he's scared that he's going to eat the child. As we all would be in in this situation. Maybe the child sings, or there's Yes. Yes, that's the connection. The child has like a lyre or uh a small um a flute. A flute, they sing, they play the flute a little bit, and Guy feels the connection. People are the same everywhere. This child is just like him in so many ways. They sing together, they become friends. It's just that one afternoon, or yeah, just the one morning and day. The child is there gathering firewood or or something. They spend the day together, and Guy doesn't eat him. Them, her, the child. It's a ten-year-old girl named Freya. Guy feels almost protective of her. But Guy knows if he returns to the village with her it's going to it's gonna mean trouble. He's afraid he's gonna eat them all if he goes. So he enjoys this experience with the child and lets her go. Maybe she will return again, maybe not. How long has it been? Ten years? Is that too much? No. So it's like the 1660s currently. Perfect. Um I think that's it for this time. Uh so what about the memories? The first memory is traveling away, being pursued by uh a big muscled hunk of a monk, the hunky monk, as he's called, and Angelique dying. So confrontation with Weischnegger. I have a memory called murdering loved ones. I think that's good enough for for uh the death of Angelique. Then there's seclusion in the Arctic Circle and Meeting a Child. Hiding my es this is hiding my essence. So all of my memories are just about full, so next time we'll have to get rid of two separate ones. And I think it makes sense that this seclusion will kind of uh this seclusion will not be good for guys' memory. So I think that's it for today. Uh I might try something a bit different with these prompts. Uh I've been writing in the same style for a long time. Maybe maybe time in the cave will change the way Guy Skeleton writes. Um, at least a little bit. I I might experiment a little bit, so look forward to that, I guess. Thanks for listening, and uh I'll talk to you next week. Bye. Thanks for listening, folks. My name is Auri Itamaki, and Solitude is my personal project. I hope you enjoyed this episode. You can follow Solitude on Instagram at SolotudeShow, and if you got something to say, drop a message or comment. I'm still figuring out what I'm doing, so I'd be happy to hear your ideas and suggestions on where to take it. Please rate and review the show so people can find it. I don't have any budget for marketing, so it would be awesome if people found the show, so please tell someone, please get someone into it who you think might enjoy it. Additional episode music and sound effects courtesy of epidemic sound and theme song by myself. Solitude drops every week. Every other week there will be an actual play episode, and on the off weeks I do a proper journal reading with music, sound effects, and everything in between. So do with that what you will. Thanks again for listening, everybody, and see you next week. Bye.